cityofchampions | HUNTERMAAAAAAAAAAAAIL

[we just ... got a letter?]

[between sips of really strong coffee] ... Huntermail?

... is that really what it's called?

[hands over the card]

[face is being ... fascinating as he reads this.

[more coffee!!!!!]

... right, then.

He's pleasant.

Not really.

Hm. Must be the coffee.

[in superfluous handwriting]

HELLO LOVELY CONTESTANTS~

YOU DON'T TAKE MY HAPPINESS SERIOUSLY, DO YOU? UGLINESS IS THE EPITOME OF RUDENESS AND AN OFFENSE TO MY SIGHT.

TODAY WE WILL MAKE YOU ACCEPTABLE FOR PUBLIC CONSUMPTION. AND MY OWN PRIVATE CONSUMPTION. PROTESTORS WILL BE SPORT FOR MY ENJOYMENT.

~ HUNTER

I MEANT TO SAY ONE WILL BE SHOT AS SPORT, BUT THERE WAS A MISUNDERSATNDING BETWEEN ME AND MY ASSISTANT.

SHE WILL NOW BE A DEMONSTRATION OF WHAT I MEANT AS SPORT.

[there are... well. blood splatters on the paper.]

[lol]

............... I'm going back to bed.

[... touches hair self-consciously]

[ALSO touches hair self-consciously!!]

[chugs coffee]

[all the contestant have been corralled and taken to a previously unseen section of the training facility; a fully stocked and manned salon. stylists are flirting about, and all mentors, for better or worse, are there as well.

and Lena is attempting to read snappy one-liners off a cue card and failing horribly.]

[not eating something for once, so clearly this is important, wearing ridic expensive designer shit she was paid to wear today.

giving her a thumbs up?]

[also in ridic expensive designer shit but hers is much more in the sweet and innocent style]

Right now these guys and gals look like they're clunkin' on a mat-- wait, what does that even mean?